The Albion FC

Midfielder

Vilem has added continental flair and hair ever since he signed for the Albion. Now in his second spell with the club, he reveals why he’s sure of his own sexual orientation and exactly what he thinks about John Stanley’s right boot.

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Name: Vilem Palac

Nicknames: Lion King / Pamela Anderson / My Little Pony

Age: 27, DOB: 18th Aug 1980

Height: 175 ish cm

Previous clubs: VMG Kyjov (twice), Joko Uherske Hradiste (also known as Synot, or Slovacko today), Albion (twice), Sinjuns (also known as St. John’s Battersea), Cherry Red 5-a-side.

Club you support: AS Roma

Favourite food: Pasta and chicken

Favourite film: Butch Cassidy and Sundance Kid

Favourite TV programme: Only Fools and Horses

Favourite player: G. Batistuta and F. Totti

Player I’m most like: hmmmm, wish it was F. Totti

Best school at subject: Lunch breaks

Superstitions: Never shave before a game

Career highlights: Being called Robbie Savage and Pamela playing Mitcham Cricketers in 2002. Also, playing Junior Premier league in the Czech Republic, often against future stars like T. Rosicky, M. Baros or P. Cech. Two seasons in Czech senior third division and being coached by A. Panenka [match winning penalty taker 1min in], K. Dobias and V. Jezek.

Music: Heavy metal and hard rock – Iron Maiden, Motley Crue, Stratovarius, Kiss or Deep Purple

Job: In Local Government (not bad for a foreigner…)

Most skilful player at Albion: Obviously me, but if I have to name others it would be John Pepperami Stanley and the outside of his right foot.

Quickest player: James Bourne, when playing down at Raynes Park he managed to use the bathroom a minute before kick off, play 45 mins, order a cab for his WAG, and be home in time for her and pretend all is cool.

Favourite game of all time: 10th March 2002 – Lazio 1 – 5 Roma, and Holland 2 – 3 Czech Rep at Euro 2004.

Favourite drink: Pilsner Urquell

Favourite football pundit: That dark haired chick on Channel 5 presenting Italian football, knows f*ck all, says f*ck all, but is fit as f*ck.

Pin up: Guess you’d expect me to say Pamela, but I actually dont have one. That still means I am absolutely sure of my sexual orientation.

Greatest team: A. Zubizareta – Cristian Panucci, Ronald Koeman, Franco Baresi, Paolo Maldini – Pavel Nedved, Falcao, Ruud Gullit, Carlos Aguilera (ex Genoa and Torino) – Gabriel Batistuta, Francesco Totti.