Barny Day – Consistent recipient of racism against gingers
It was the best of games, it was the worst of games, it was the age of games planned on an iPad, it was the age of chaos on the pitch, it was the epoch of confidence, it was the epoch of doubt, it was the 50th Anniversary Season, it was the Season of Under-performing, it was the spring of hope, it was the autumn of frustration, Albion had the league title before us, Albion had relegation before us, we were all going direct to the pub, we were all going straight home – in short, the game against league rivals Southbank was so much like our prior matches, that Albion’s noisiest fans insisted on the match report being written, for good or for evil, by the Albion 2012 Player of the Year and new father, Barny Day.
It all started so well, Jade didn’t get lost on the 10 minute drive over from Clapham, the changing room had a working light, toilets (which Bill and Barny quickly said hello to) and even hot water. As we got changed into our new extra extra extra large kit – which made Will C Jimmy Saville’s new best friend –  Jade went on for some time about Wimbledon dogs (most people ignored him), he then explained that he wanted to eradicate the entire ginger population with his racist views and finally we got down to football.
We lined up in a 1-4-2-3-2-1-2-3-2-1-1-2-3-4-3-2-1 formation. Bill B in nets, Dunc right back, Ginger number 2 left back, Al and ginger number 1 at centre back, right mid was Nick M, centre mid Simon and Jimmy’s best new friend, left Mid Matt, Up front Donovan and Albions on wide boy. Which meant on the bench we had Northern Johnny, Matts look alike Jo and Albion’s own Ryan Giggs (yes, he will sleep with your wife) Steve.
Matt Garwood – Getting comfortable scoring hattricks
The game got off to a fast and frantic start with Albion showing fantastic energy and commitment. Only a few minutes in Matt jinked his way along the left wing beating one or two men and then smashing the ball in, this was followed closely with two more excellent finishers as Matt secured a 30 minute hat trick.
Southbank then began to get back into the game with a number of set pieces which overall the whole team defended well. Just before the half time whistle, it looked like Albion had made it 4, but from only a couple of metres out Matt (who had been playing ok to be honest) hit the ball over the bar (I think he had heard about the famous Jindy squirrel moments and wanted some of the action). However at half time whistle went Albion could not have been happier at being 3-0 up.
During half time there was some heated discussions about positioning and shape which showed the team’s hunger and enthusiasm for victory. We also had to make two substitutions and Don and Matt both carrying injuries (and Matt embarrassment) being replaced.
Simon Abbott – inspiring divers across the SSFL
Southbank made two changes at half time bringing on a ‘big man’ up front who they spent the second half launching the ball long too. Albion knew it was going to be a very different half and maybe gave the opposition a little too much respect.
Southbank got back into the game thanks to one of these long balls, a free kick was delivered from inside their own half and, with no Albion player taking command to win the ball in the air, the Southbank player was able to flick the ball past the on rushing Bill and into the net.
This was the spark that Southbank needed. The balls kept coming in and through individual errors or poor communication Southbank quickly made it 3-2. Albion were now up against it. The next long ball which came into the box was jumped at by Aleks who collided with Southbanks new ‘bigman’ who decided that he was going to fall over quicker than Simon ‘the diver’ Abbott. The referee, who looked awfully like Micky ‘bricks’ Stone from acclaimed BBC drama The Hustle, gave a very soft penalty. Luckily for Albion, the Southbank goalkeeper stepped up to take the pen and swept it wide (a let off!!).
Albion where then given another almighty gift as the Southbank goalkeeper attempted to dribble out of his own box, he was well closed down by Steve, the goalkeeper slipped and Steve was able to take the ball and after what felt like an age pass the ball into the open net. 4-2. However Albion by this stage were sitting deeper and deeper worried about the pace in the Southbank front line and long balls being smashed at them. As Albion broke up the play the ball broke to a Southbank player on the corner of the area, as he attempted to cross the ball he instead managed to loop the ball over the entire back 4 and keeper and into the net – 4-3.
With only 5 minutes left could Albion hold on? Unfortunately not. Another scramble in the area led to another poached goal – 4-4. The match finished with Southbank on the front foot and Albion ultimately lucky to hold on to a point. After the final whistle Southbank showed their true South London colours with three pushing and shoving arguments springing up all over the pitch.
A very frustrating morning, 2 points dropped and again lots of goals conceded due to a lack of communication, assertiveness and people taking command of the situations. Albion know that to avoid being involved in a relegation dog fight we must defend better.