The Albion FC

Day: Albion's Midnight Cowboy

Only three players received nominations for man of the match this week. Andy came in third whilst Rich’s brace of goals earned him second place. However, the stats don’t lie and the overwhelming winner of the award this week was Albion’s greatest ever centre back [excluding cup games, double headers, and games where Bill hasn’t played] Simon Abbott.

And to the Henri Leconte award. The Slaternator picked up a vote for impersonating John Terry and heading the ball whilst seemingly lying on the pitch. In second place was the Gaffer for his navigating skills. Squad members returning from the game taken on an apparent “short cut” down a series of South London backstreets only to emerge back onto the main road they’d turned off 20 yards from where they’d left it. Oddly there was a vote for the navigation skills of Dave – a passenger in said vehicle. Clearly, that vote was not from the gaffer trying to distract attention from his own shocking skills.

However, the clear winner this week was Barny who turned up looking like a camp hiker. Wearing a peculiar outfit consisting of rain jacket, jeans tucked into his socks, sunglasses and heavy duty chastity belt, the Barn-dog proceeded to get himself involved in some verbal handbags with the opposition. Ordered to return to the other side of the pitch by the referee some of the opposition subs took umbrage at Barnes’ sauntering stroll to the Albion half and  questioned whether Barnywas in fact going back round. Barny cemented this week’s Henri Leconte by summoning the spirit of Dustin Hoffmann in Midnight Cowboy and dismissing his critics with the line: “I’m walkin’, I’m walkin’!”