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ALBION DENY HEADING BRAIN DAMAGE FEARS


Lauder: Repeatedly mumbled "They're all off."

Heading a football can damage the brain according to new research from America. The scientists found that repeatedly heading the ball caused damage similar to concussion.

However, Albion players said they saw no danger. When questioned about the study Albion centre back Barny Day simply dribbled from the corner of his mouth whilst his eyes stared unfocussed into the middle distance. Whilst Stew Lauder rebutted all lines of questioning on the subject by slowly shuffling round in a small circle mumbling: “They’re all off!”

Albion supremo Jade Barker was equally as scathing that any players was risking their health. Barker said: “You can’t tell me there any risk to my lads brains. Few of them have that much that can be damaged. Centre backs are ten a penny anyway. We can just get some more in and turn them to cabbages too.”

This entry was posted on 1 December 2011, 12:15 pm and is filed under News. You can follow any responses to this entry through RSS 2.0. Both comments and pings are currently closed.

  1. #1 by man withdog in clapham on 2 December 2011 - 8:10 pm

    I’m confused as to why you sought Barney’s opinion on heading the ball… I’m sure everyone in Albion is confused. My dog has more aerial prowess than that ginger nonse.

    It’s like asking Jade about shooting or Jindy/Will about taking a throw-in.

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